Mother's Day

This weekend I decided to go spend the weekend at my parent's lake house. I drove out with the kids Saturday & Chris met us early Sunday morning. We had a really good time. Me and Everly went with my parents to get our toes done & the kids loved playing in the pop up pool. The kids always have a really good time out there & I can't wait until the summer and we can go more often. We went out to a nice lunch and then we ate dinner at their house before heading home this evening. Tomorrow marks just 3 short weeks until I'm working from home sewing full time & Tuck is out for the summer. I really feel so blessed the last 4 mother's days. When I look at my 3 beautiful kids it isn't beyond me how crazy this journey has been. They were each born to another mother, to be HER baby. To make HER a mommy. How I got SO blessed to be chosen to take her place I'll never know. But, what I do know is, I try everyday to take a minute to really "see" each of them. To listen to Tuck giggle from the other room, watch Delilah laugh until her nose wrinkles just like mine, and how Everly always tries so hard to please others just to make them happy. There are many days that it feels whatever I do for them, it can't be enough. I can't spend all day playing with them taking them to do things they love, we can't go on nice vacations. Am I patient enough, firm enough, supportive enough, loving enough, playful enough. But every once in awhile I realize it is enough. In the car on the way to my parent's house I looked in the rear view mirror to see Tuck watching me sing loud & obnoxious. He had the sweetest smile, and I realized he got joy from my joy, and that's a great feeling. Or when I punish Everly & put her in time out, Lyla sees her crying & walks over hugs her & gives her the sweetest soft kiss & asks "ok?, ok?". In those moments i feel so proud & I realize I may not have given them everything, but it's been enough. There was a time when today would have been such a "burn" for me. It was just a day designed to remind me of something we didn't have. I am so glad I had faith that God had a plan for me & my life. He has never failed me. So to all of you ladies who are there too, biological moms, first moms, foster moms, adoptive moms, those who are fighting to be a mommy, have lost a pregnancy, want another baby, or plastering on that smile to get through today, Happy Mother's Day! You can be a mom long before you hold that baby!